"don't judge me. you don't know me."

When Kaffee or I say something completely inappropriate, it is usually followed by one of us giving the other a look of judgment, which always makes the inappropriate person come back with:

"Don't judge me.  You don't know me."

This has become our little joke.  We think it's really cute and funny because we know that look means we've read the other perfectly . . . we really do know each other inside and out.  This is just one of the many things that make us "us," and it's fun not just to have someone to goof around with, but also to have someone who judges you not because of what you said, but because they wish they had said it first!

Can we go too far and actually say something offensive to one another? Never. 

Can we go too far and actually say something that truly offends Oliver? Apparently, that answer is yes. 

 

four steps

I'm a girl, which means when I get really upset, and I mean really upset, I'm an emotional wreck.  Even worse is when I get really, really upset in the WINTER, when I feel as though I haven't been warm, tan, and/or pretty in months . . . when I get upset in the winter, and if you happen to cross my path, the only advice I have is: watch out!  Because, even though I rarely drink water and consume way too much salt, the tears will never end.

After our third year of dating, and after deciding to live together, I knew I needed to provide Kaffee with a list of steps that would either calm me down or, at the very least, help him stay off my shit list.  In college he easily stayed off the shit list because when something really upset us we could just be apart and have time to reflect on our own.  But now, there's nowhere to go.  My home is his home . . . he is my home, and since Kaffee is a man, who is also an only child, I thought I would spare him the pain and torture of having to decipher my form of crazy by giving him these steps.

Step 1: Be supportive (which also means do not say anything negative about me, please);

Step 2: Give me a hug (when I'm upset I like to be held);

Step 3: Leave me alone to cry (this doesn't mean leave the room, it just means don't make me talk to you about it yet); and

Step 4: After I have cried my eyes out, give me constructive criticism and advice.  Tell me how I could have handled the situation better or how I should handle it going forward. 

Sometimes he remembers the steps and follows them and sometimes he doesn't, and when he doesn't, he really wishes he had.  Because when it comes to me, starting at Step 4 will only make Step 3 last longer because I'm now not only crying about what upset me in the first place, but also about the way I handled the situation.  I'll eventually get to Step 2 and we'll hug it out and I'll stop being upset with him for not giving me the comfort I needed, but then we rarely will get to Step 1, which to me is the most important step.

As women we tend to emotionally support people all day, whether it be our friends, boyfriends, husbands, children, parents, or even superiors, which is why, I believe, we crash so hard.  Because when we crash, and I do mean crash, it is no longer just about one incident or event, it's about every emotion, good or bad, that we've been carrying with us.

I know it's not the best way of handling things. I know I shouldn't crash, but I do.  I crash, and I fall, and every now and then it feels like I will never be able to get back up.  But every time Kaffee engulfs me with his embrace and tells me we will get through anything and everything together, every time he guides me back to my feet and my sanity, I go from feeling completely empty to completely whole, and I am lucky that after six years of putting up with my form of crazy, he still wakes up every morning and chooses to spend his life with me.

lax 1&2

I promise this is not becoming a lost blog.  In the future, there will still be recipes, clothes, and puppy discussions, but every Wednesday, or at least once a week, I will give you a list of observations and questions Lost has answered and new questions the producers have decided to torture us with.  One would think with this being the final season of Lost, we would be receiving answers and not questions, but this is Lost, people.  We should be use to this by now!

Here we go:

simple pleasures

Today we are going to start a new label simply titled: simple pleasures.  Life is tough, but if you pay attention to the small things in your day that put a smile on your face, life feels a little less difficult.

Some of the things that put a smile on my face will be weird, but, nonetheless, they make me smile, which will hopefully have the same affect on you.

For example, today at 9:00 a.m. I went to use the restroom at work and when I opened the door to my usual stall, the toilet seat was up and the cleaning detergent bubbles were still in the water, and this made me happy because I knew it was freshly cleaned.

I know that's weird. A clean toilet should not put a smile on my face or be worth writing about, especially because I work in a very clean and nice office building with many clean and nice people, but it made me happy and made me realize that simple pleasures should be embraced. So, there . . . the first simple pleasure: a clean toilet seat.

a treat from the onion

I am sure this is the way Kaffee feels about my obsession with Lost.  But, like most losties, I just can't help myself.


Final Season Of 'Lost' Promises To Make Fans More Annoying Than Ever

lowry hill

See with the right camera and angle, someone can even make our local liquor store seem beautiful:

Photo by flickr user: tjdewey

friendship cloth

I love this idea! Now I'll need to find the right tablecloth.

http://banquet.typepad.com/banquet/2010/01/friendship-cloth.html